Faces
Original artwork by Maria (Ishaiya) Phillips Copyright 2008-2013

It’s misty outside. At last it feels as though spring has finally hit our shores, with the cold bite in the air now almost gone. For now at least. My three children are shouting at each other in protest, but I have not the will at the moment to tell them to stop for the nth time today. New faces look at me through the wooden slats of the Venetian blind from the other side of the window, deeply lined yet friendly and with stories to tell. Amid the chaos of the afternoon, I feel oddly calm. My inner Buddha sitting cross-legged with eyes closed and in prayer somewhere in the deep recesses of my soul. I’m trying to block the tension in my stomach being generated by my three tired little people. I feel it all, all the time. There is no respite. Always switched on intuitively like a powerful radio mast that can pick up and trace signals from across the oceans, time, space, alternate dimensions. That thought amuses me. It’s my ability to go that extra mile in my imagination that fuels my sense of humour, almost on the verge of the ridiculous. Yet it makes me laugh not because it’s ridiculous, but because of the irony buried within it. I spend so much of my time now it seems not being around other people in the physical sense, because I simply cannot cope with the constant emotional involvement that comes with being an empath and being able to pick up on and read other people’s energy. I can tell who it is when the phone rings, or what kind of e-mail or text I’m receiving when my various devices ping. Strange you might think, but not to me. It is everyday fare, and I’m long used to it.

I spent much of my late teens until my thirties working in customer services and public relations in various industries, and although I loved the work I did, there came a point where I felt as though I was constantly wired. Kind of a psychic information overload if you like. Unfortunately the more intuitively and spiritually open and aware I became, the more I was unable to block all the signals I was receiving. I discovered during that time that even just touching people’s personal effects (such as passports) could establish a powerful connection with a resulting flood of information pouring into my head from a total stranger. The problem with this kind of ability is that the information received is not always desirable or pleasant, which is a whole different kettle of fish in itself. Although I would consider myself to be emotionally very strong and stable, too much exposure to this kind of thing can have its own detriments.

Fortunately I was taken out of the professional public world when I had my first child. Three children later and ‘far from the madding crowd’ so to speak, with no desire to return to that kind of stress. Being a mother of a small brood also has its own impact on your social life and ability to make new connections. I miss the banter with good friends the most, having a good time and good laugh at ourselves and the world. I guess this is why I have started writing my various blogs, by way of getting myself ‘back out there’, at least on more negotiable terms. I’ve also attempted to launch a new career as a Jewellery Designer and Maker, but with little success so far. Again I can only chuckle at myself. Try everything at least once is kind of my rule to life. It has its merits, and sometimes not!

My children are sounding calm now, the din has finally subsided. The faces through the window have gone. Just the fine rain and the mist now.

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